Summer Cut

Yesterday when I was writing my post about my Mini Me I wanted to link back to a post about Haley's summer haircut.  I looked for it and found it and tried to link to it and then realized I had never published it.  So here is a post from the beginning of the summer, it is out of order but it makes sense with the topic from yesterday.

It was time for the Summer Cut.  Actually it was long past time, but you know how it is.  I had to make an appointment and then I had to wait.

Every morning for about a week, as I sprayed water on Haley's hair and tried to comb through it I was tempted to tell her that I had made the appointment.  I wanted to say something like "Haley, I can't wait for your haircut appointment!" But I bit my tongue.  I didn't say anything.  I didn't really want her to anticipate the appointment.

Haley is really good at her haircut appointments lately, but something has changed.  The spa that I take her to has relocated.  The sinks that they wash your hair in are really different.  They are not at each station, they are all along one wall.  They are low and pretty comfortable.  I am sure they are much easier for the stylists to use.

I was excited for Haley to try it.  She has been so good about laying back at the dentist.  I thought that maybe now would be a good time for her to lay back to get her hair washed by the stylist.

I waited to tell Haley that she was going to get a haircut until about an hour before the appointment.  I didn't ask her to take a bath before hand like I usually do.  We just got in the car and left.

When it was Haley's turn we followed the stylist right to the sinks.  Haley tensed up.  I asked her to sit down in the chair.  She didn't want to.  She did it though.  Then I asked her to sit back.  NO WAY.  I tried to get her to turn around in the chair and look at the sink and the back of the chair, she wouldn't budge.  I told her that she wouldn't be laying back as far as she did at the dentist.  I said "You have been laying back so well at the dentist, you can do it here too."

I tried to gently push her back.  She resisted.  She is strong.

I apologized to the stylist.

I tried again.

I told her that it was fun to lay back and have her hair washed by the stylist.  Another stylist tried to jump on board and convince her to try it.  She made comments about the horses that Haley held.  I don't think Haley heard her.  She was fully in her stubborn mode.

After several minutes of this I gave up.  I apologized to the stylist again and we followed her to her station.

Haley was very stoic through the haircut.  A couple of times I thought that she was going to cry, but that may have been me projecting.  She was definitely quiet.

 

I realized at this point that I didn't take a before shot.

When the haircut was over she smiled and touched her hair.  I could tell that she liked it.  I told her that she looked cute.  She said "Cute."  We thanked the stylist and got in the car.  As I drove home she kept pointing to her teeth and saying "ist" which means Dentist and "doctor."  

I said "No Haley we aren't going to the dentist, I just thought that you could sit back and let her wash your hair because you have been so good about laying back for the dentist lately."  She grunted.  

She was mad at me because we didn't go to the dentist. Go, figure!

She stewed and brewed quietly in the backseat for most of the ride home, and then suddenly she yelled "CUT!"  I jumped out of my skin.  I looked in the rear view mirror.  She was upset.  I simply said "You have a cute haircut."  She said "Haircut" in such a sweet tone, a complete 180 from the second before.  

She put her hand up to her hair and said "Cute."  I breathed a sigh of relief.

That is the way it usually is.  She can go from upset and screaming to smiling and laughing in a blink.  The difference is my reaction, most of the time.  I try to use a tone of voice that is reassuring sometimes, other times I use a happy friendly voice.  Sometimes I use a sarcastic tone and she gets that too.  It is a crap shoot really, I never know what will set her off and I never know if there is anything I can do to diffuse it, but I try.  

The rest of the ride home was uneventful.  

I had her take a bath as soon as we got home so that I could get all of the little hairs under control.  I didn't want her to be itchy.  I rinsed and rinsed and rinsed.  I know I didn't get them all.  She enjoyed showing her Dad and her Big Sis her haircut.  They both said it was cute.  

I forgot to take an after picture too.

~ Haley's Mom

I am participating in 31 for 21 Blog Challenge this month. The challenge I have accepted is to blog every day in October to raise awareness for Down Syndrome. Learn more about Down Syndrome at the National Association of Down Syndrome.

Mini Me

Haley has a really short haircut.

I have been getting her hair cut short in the summer for a while now.  I usually let it grow out the rest of the year.  I call it her Summer Cut.

This year she got a summer cut and then in the fall I had it cut even shorter.  I was actually thinking that it looked really cute and it was really easy to care for, so why not?  I really don't think Haley cares.  Actually I think she likes it when I spend as little time as possible fussing with her hair.

I didn't think anything of it.

And then the comments started.

My hair is really short too.  Haley and I have very different hair though.  Hers is really curly and thick and mine is very very thin.  I actually have mine cut short because it was looking way to thin to me and also I was tired of it in my face.  I didn't like it in my face when it was windy or when I rolled over in bed or when I looked down.  

I was just tired of it so I asked my stylist to give me a pixie cut.

It is the sixth time in life that I have had a pixie cut.  I really like it, then I grow it out for a few years and then I get it cut again.  It has been a while since the last time.  I had to really convince my stylist to cut it short, she had never seen me with short hair.  I don't know what her hesitation was.  I think she thought that I would be shocked or disappointed.  I finally told her that I had had it that short several times in my life and I knew what I was doing.  So she cut it.

When I took Haley in for her summer cut this year I said what I have said before - I wanted it cut about an inch all over her head.  Our stylist didn't really do that, it wasn't as short as I wanted it to be.  I still had to fuss with her hair quite a bit to make it look good.  And it blew around in the wind.  It needed to be shorter.

That is why I had her stylist cut it even shorter just before school started.

She got a trim again not too long ago.

A friend of mine told me the other day that she never had seen the resemblance between Haley and I, but she sees it now.  (Now that we have the same haircut.) 

So apparently, without even trying, I have created a Mini Me.

That was really not my intention.

~ Haley's Mom

I am participating in 31 for 21 Blog Challenge this month. The challenge I have accepted is to blog every day in October to raise awareness for Down Syndrome. Learn more about Down Syndrome at the National Association of Down Syndrome.

Was it something I said?

I scheduled a haircut appointment for Haley at 3:00 pm.

The bus drops her off at our house anywhere between 2:00 pm and 2:15 pm, so I thought there would be enough time for Haley to have a snack and also some time for me to wash Haley's hair.

Haley will not put her head back in the sink at the salon. Our stylist cannot wash Haley's hair. I learned a long time ago that I had to do it at home.  Her hair is still wet when we get there, wet enough anyway that all she has to do is spray a little more water on it. She also puts a cream in it that keeps it workable while she cuts it. It is fascinating to watch her cut Haley's hair.  Curly hair is really a different animal.

So, anyway, I thought I had enough time.

I had planned out what I was going to do. I was going to let Haley come in and do her normal after school routine. I was going to let her take off her shoes and jacket and put them away. Then I was going to let her check on our cat, go to the bathroom. wash her hands, and get a snack.  Then I would wash her hair and we would go.

So the bus pulls up and Haley gets out. We walk in to the house.

And...

I lose my mind.

I tell her that she has a haircut appointment.

I tell her that I want to wash her hair.

I realize what I have done and I try to back track.  I try to explain myself. I try to reassure her that she has time for a snack.

It is too late. I am ruined.

Haley started touching her hair and giving me a really concerned almost scared look. I don't know what she was thinking. I said "Your hair is going to be pretty."

"Pretty!" she cried. She cried. She touched her hair some more.

Oh, no...

"Yes, your hair is pretty now, but it needs a little trim. You like to get your hair cut. Are you excited to see Camille?" (name changed)

"Camille?"

"Yes. Do you want to see her?"

"Yeah."

OK. So then I came back to my senses and we took off her shoes and her coat and put them away. She did the rest of her routine and I offered her a snack. I didn't wait for her to ask for it. I made it and put it in front of her. This agitated her too. She got upset all over again.  I turned the TV on and tried to get her to focus on her show. 

That helped.

When she was done with her snack I told her it was time to wash her hair. I asked her if I could wash her hair in the sink. She looked a little concerned. She agreed and we walked over to the sink. I tried to help her bend over the sink and she balked. I don't know why I thought that was going to work. I told her that it was OK.

We would go take a quick bath.

We went upstairs and as we walked in to the bathroom she started crying again. At this point I was dumbfounded. I don't know if she was still upset about the assault she got when she got home, or if something else was going on. I tried to explain to her that we were just going to wash her hair and get her dressed again and then we would go. She cried the entire time she got undressed and while the tub filled. She cried while I washed her hair. She cried while I dried her hair and helped her get dressed.

I told her it was time to go.

"Go," she said.

"Yes, it is time, let's go."

Then she was fine. We got her shoes and jacket on and left. The haircut was fine. She sat completely still. She was very quiet. When we left she touched her hair and said "Pretty."

I knew better.

I had a plan. I sabotaged myself and I don't even know why.

I got ahead of myself.

I must remember this lesson in the future.

My Dad

Haley never knew her other Grandpa, my Dad.  He died the year before she was born.

I can hardly believe that that was over fourteen years ago. 

My Dad would have loved Haley.  He loved her sister very much.  He really had a soft spot for little kids, but especially girls.  When we called and told him that Haley's Big Sis was born he said "Thanks for having a girl."

Haley reminds me of my Dad every day.  Not just because she was born shortly after he left us, but because she is a lot like him.  When Haley was born I looked over at her while the nurses were doing their tests on her. For a moment I saw my Dad in her face. She looked just like him.

My Dad was a motor head.  He loved cars and trucks and motorcycles and boats; anything with a motor and a tailpipe.  I remember when Haley was really little she would turn her head to the sound of a motor.  If a motorcycle went by outside she paid attention.  I don't remember if he cared much for trains, but if he saw how much she loves them I bet he would have liked them too. 

She got that from her other Grandpa.

There are many ways that Haley reminds me of my Dad.  She has looks and mannerisms that are very similar.  It's funny that although she does repeat herself a lot, she does have a tendency to not repeat herself when you want her to.  If I ask her a question and I don't hear the answer she will not say it again.  My Dad did that.

My Dad was cool.  I mean "Fonzie" cool.  His look was very much from the '50's.  He had curly hair that he slicked back into a duck tail. Yes, that is where Haley gets her curly hair from.  He wore jeans and a white t-shirt pretty much exclusively.  He rolled a pack of cigarettes up in his t-shirt sleeve up until four months before he died. 

He stopped smoking then. 

It was too late though.  When the doctors gave him four months to live it seemed like he took them at their word.  He lived those last few months to the hilt though.  He took care of business and he put his life in order.  He stopped working and started having fun.  He was a different person.  Even though I know he was in pain he seemed to enjoy the time he had left.

I miss him.

I am thinking about him now because we are heading to Montana to see my family. I will see my father in my brother and my sister. I will probably also see him in their children. He would have loved to be around them.

Along the road to Montana a huge group of bikers were heading the other direction.  The cacophony of sound that came from their bikes made me think of my Dad. 

He would have loved it. 

From the backseat I heard Haley say "Ooooh. Wow."

Summer Haircut

Haley was awesome at her haircut appointment.  She sat perfectly still.  She was mesmerized by the process.  The stylist used a razor to cut it this time and I know how interesting that feels.  I was impressed.  I tried to take before pictures, but she wasn't cooperating and it really didn't show her hair very well.  She was a little more interested in posing afterwards.

This is the typical pose these days.

I asked her to turn so I could get a shot of the back.  The stylist cut a lot.  There were curls all over the floor.  Don't worry it will grow back.  And soon.

When we got home I asked her to pose for me again.  I got the same reaction so I was patient.  You have to be to take pictures of her.  If I ask her to smile she just says "smile" and she doesn't do it.  She is not an easy subject.

I guess I was done at this point.

Those Curls

Haley's hair is usually the first thing people notice about her.  They always say "Where did she get that curly hair?" and I always say "My Dad had curly hair like hers."  I don't know if my Dad appreciated his curly hair.  When I knew him he didn't have a lot of it, the top of his head was bald.  He kept his hair pretty short and he washed it several times a day to keep it under control.  Haley's hair is just like my Dad's was.  It is not the only thing she has in common with him.

Her hair has always been curly.  We could actually see her hair in the ultrasounds we had when I was pregnant.  The technician pointed out her hair, there was a lot of it and it was already curly.

Haley has perfect hair.  It's curly, but not kinky.  It's soft.  It doesn't take any effort to make it look good.  I spray it with water and comb it and then I fluff it with my fingers and when it drys it turns into the most beautiful mass of curls.  My Mom likes to play with her curls when she fixes her hair, but it really isn't necessary.  My husband just combs it straight back and sometimes uses a brush.  It looks better if he uses a comb, but Haley's hair is very forgiving.  It usually just obliges and turns out great.

I kept Haley's hair very short when she was young because I was afraid that it would get out of control if it got too long.  I love it short, it is easy to care for and so cute.  I decided a couple of years ago to see what would happen if we just let it grow long.  It never really looked any longer than shoulder length even though when it was wet I could stretch it down to her waist.  It was fun and it never got out of control.  I could put it up in pigtails and pony tails and I even french braided it a couple of times.  I always had to do something with the front like a pony on top or a headband.  She didn't have bangs.  Last year I had it all cut off again in an attempt to get her to quit nodding.

Cutting is not as easy as fixing it.  When Haley was little it was not easy to get her hair cut.  Haley will not sit back and let someone wash her hair, ever.  A few hairdressers tried that and it was a disaster.  Finally I just told them to spray her hair with water and go from there.  Now I just give her a bath prior to a hair appointment so that her hair is still wet when we get there.

Once I took her to get her hair cut and she had such a fit, she was screaming and crying.  The hair dresser had only done the right side of her head and then stopped and asked me if she should continue.  Are you kidding me?  Was I supposed to take her home with only one side of her hair cut?

Another hairdresser was so nervous.  I had to hold Haley's head still while she cut her hair, I had both of my hands on the side of her face by her chin.  When she was done I noticed that she had cut her own fingers trying to be so careful not to cut Haley.

I now take Haley to my stylist.  She does a great job.  Haley has grown up a lot, she knows that when she is done she will be pretty, so she does a very good job of sitting still.  She is getting a haircut today.  This is going to be her summer cut.  We are going very short, back to the style she had when she was little.  I am excited about it.  I will post pictures tomorrow.